Advice for non muslim dating a muslim
Advice for non muslim dating a muslim - No credit free chat flirt teens
He can’t or won’t be the husband and father that you seek, and it doesn’t matter if his reasons are due to culture, religion, or other things.All you need to know is that this relationship can’t give you what you want, and it will take from you more than it gives.
I understand why, I really do, but personally as a woman of 41 years old that still wants to have children, am I kidding myself to think that he might eventually come around or that it could even work at all?From the beginning it has been clear that there are obstacles to our being together and we kept it very casual and light, but in the past few months we have become much, much closer and he expressed his love for me, and now I have allowed myself to love him very dearly also.However, what just happened a couple hours ago brought our true situation very present to me.It is possible that this man does have very strong feelings for you, but even if he feels like he is in love with you, he is not willing to treat you lovingly by your standards. I know you asked for a Muslim’s take on this issue, and I mention religion very little because what you need to understand is that this has nothing to do with religion.He’s got priorities that outrank you, and continuing this relationship will be a constant struggle between his family, his culture, and/or his religious views and you. This is a universal truth, or at least universal enough to respect it as a rule, acknowledging that there are occasional exceptions.At the time, I hated to hear this advice because I was that guy—the Muslim in a relationship with a non-Muslim girl that few of my friends knew about.
I rationalized this by telling myself we come from different cultural and religious backgrounds that I was not doing this to hurt her.
Yes we come from different backgrounds but I did not do enough to understand her background.
Of course I understand that in any relationship there is a period in the beginning where you may want to keep your relationship private, where you are still negotiating your differences.
But your case is different: you have dated this person for 9 month, you are 41, and you have a desire for a serious relationship that may involve having children.
I recommend you sit with your partner as soon as you can and ask about his commitment. Tell him how you feel by the fact that so few of his friends know about your relationship and how anxious you fell over the direction/uncertainty of your relationship.
He is so liberal in so many ways but I’m very uncomfortable being a secret when we have professed such deep love for each other…and he’s not just saying it, it’s true for him.